I hate my anxiety.

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❅ the musings of a wannabe garden fairy ❅

I hate my anxiety.

I hate the fact that even just going to school can make me want scream.

Or throw up.

Or tear out my insides until they’re all gone and I will finally have a reason for an excused absence,

Because “not mentally well” is no excuse.

I hate the fact that just being next to you makes me want to curl up and cry

All because I tore you out of my life

But you didn’t even care,

So I can’t bear the awkwardness that might pursue

If I were to stand next to you.

I hate the fact that you’re completely perfect in every way.

And everyone absolutely loves you.

And they can’t even see me because I just stand in the shadows behind you.

I hate the fact that you hate that you’re oh-so awkward.

When I can barely have a conversation without wanting to throw…

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